Skip to main content

By myself

I am not sure what is going on with me. I have so many different thoughts in my head on a daily basis. There are people that I really love in my life that have begun to bother me a bit. I know it is not necessarily because of them but because of the change that I am going through in my own life.

I have to move on from the stage of being afraid of making the next move. I know that I have been afraid of the judgement of other people and now I don't want to hurt any one's feelings but I don't really care so much what other people think about me anymore. I know this is going to help me get on a different level.

The question at hand is then, what is the next level? I know that it is one that happens on a spiritual level first and that is why I have the guts to now go on by myself if need be. Which makes me think about a song that my mother sings and the words go like this: I'll go if I have to go by myself, I'll go if I have to go by myself. Send me I'll go. And though it is a gospel song that is praising God and letting Him know that when asked, as a Christian, I will go even if I am alone. This is the new stage of my life.

I have put the fear to the side, by the grace of God. I know there are so many people that want to see me fail. I know there are even those whom have hoped for my downfall but when God is on your side, who cares who is against you. Thank you Lord for this new breakthrough in my life.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Whitney already told you

 Today I just knew that I needed to write a post.  Sometimes I know what I am going to write before I start, and then other times, I'm just winging it. There are plenty of things on my mind and I still don't know what my topic of the day will be. That is until I know what it is going to be. I look at the people in my life every day.  No, not physically but logically and some of the time emotionally. I come to the same realization every time.  First off, there is no such thing as coincidence, in my opinion. I believe that the family you are born into is based on many things, but it is never a mistake.  When you meet your friends, lovers and others, it is for a divine reason.  All things work for the good.  Not some of the time; all of the time. Now let me be clear, two things can and are usually true at the same time.  You can have a happy life and feel joy while still feeling sad over certain situations. The reverse can also be true where in you f...
Post a Comment
Read more

Cafe Bustelo with a little cream

 I don't even think there is a phrase that describes the feeling that I currently have about my life.  It has been approximately, a year and a half since I have last shared.  The truth is that I have barely even written anything beyond a text message in that time.  For a while I called it writer's block but now, I know that is not a true assessment. The truth is more emotion and far-reaching than that would connote. When last we spoke I believe I was legally ending the worse chapters of my life.  Now, this is not to say that some good times were not had in that more than decade of my life, but the bad times definitely outweighed the good ones.  The lessons were a multitude with nary a time to rest really.  I am good with the knowledge of this at this point.  There has to be bad in order to enjoy the good; the night must fall in order for the sun to rise; there would be no way to turn left if you didn't have the option of turning right.  You g...
Post a Comment
Read more

True Confession!

I have a confession to make. It's funny because telling a secret or making a confession is a very hard thing yet once it's done that weight has been lifted and you feel a little lighter. That being said confession is just good for the soul. I know that the devil is trying his best to keep me from obtaining my destiny and this confession is getting ready to shame him because he is a liar and he will not kill or destroy me. I am taking back the power I gave him in this situation. I just had a birthday and I turned 36. I love when my birthday comes around. This year was no difference. Actually, it was a lot better than it has been in years. Partially because I spent my day getting to know a new person in my life but mostly because I have been getting to know myself. This is my real-life confession. I didn't begin to feel good about myself until I was in my 30's--I was around 32 actually. I had the most negative self-talk a person could have. My self-esteem and self-imag...
Post a Comment
Read more